Uncle Shorty's White Oak Tree...

...was planted on Friday afternoon, on the southwest side of da Lane. We also planted the Hemlock Memorial Tree from Kevin's Family next to the one we planted on January 6, 2007 at Dad's Memorial BonFire.




Turns out that after insisting daily since Dad's Memorial that she wanted a White Oak -- not a Red Oak, or a Pin Oak, or a Swamp Oak (all readily available locally) -- Mom doesn't remember requesting the White Oak, but seems glad that it's there to see each day as comes and goes to DayCare. It's on the same side of da Lane as the Magnolia she planted in Randy's Memory, and that should help her make a connection.






We dedicated Uncle Shorty's White Oak Tree and Hemlock Saturday morning before NancyTurtle's plane left. Carl, Patty, Nancy, Kevin and I planted the remainder of Dad's ashes, nuts, and bolts beneath.



















Behind Diana to the left you can see the Anniversary Bed (double white headboard) coming on with Chrysanthemums and those 'sub-zero' Pansies. The Hibiscus in the center of the Rose of Sharon Bed above that are now in their third blooming.









The ShortyMobile is ready to be delivered. "Ridin' fine!" says CMo.

This weekend marks the resolve of a number of the major Estate Issues! *does the Dance o' Joy*


Before leaving, NancyTurtle moved (and hauled water for) two of da Lane bareroot trees (now five to seven years old) to the southeast side of da Lane, between the Pussy Willow Tree, behind the Flowering Almond, and south of Drew and Cinda's Wedding Tree. Many, many thanks!

NancyTurtle has since arrived safely to her off-the-grid locale. *waves in a southwesterly direction*

The four other gifted Hemlocks from the C-Fam were also planted on Friday, along the driveway south of da Red House.


Happy September's End, October Begin!!

*raises a tall glass of iced water*

Done...

...with RadioTherapy Treatments!

With a Certificate of Completion, signed by the technicians! The exit interview involved a review of the reasons to call the oncall oncologist: increased chest pain, problems with breathing, coughing up blood -- pretty much reasons I'll call _someone_ were it to happen.

The esophagitis will linger a week or three, but we should be able to start decreasing the amount, and the frequency, of the RadioTherapy Shooters. We're also assuming this will result in my blood pressure issues resolving themselves, and will be monitoring it daily to be sure. Official 'doctor follow-up' in four weeks, probably in conjunction with the CT scan with contrast on October 24th.

We were given some cream in case my skin begins to burn more as the effects of the molecular changes will supposedly course through my system for the next three or for weeks.

I've noticed being more tired the past few days and my vocal chords seem more affected this week. Probably good for everyone that I don't feel much like talking...

It's a good feeling to know that this weekend we can begin to focus more on healing and repairing my body from these past treatments, as opposed to just maintaining throughout the weekend for one final treatment next week. I'll be able to walk again in the morning; fall mornings are one of my favorite times to walk.

Given that this is major leaf-fall time in da Woods, I'm hoping to do a little each day so as not to have to cram it all into one or two weekends as we always seemed to end up doing in the past. Spring is a very different place here if we haven't carefully managed our leaves. *nods*

The trees that we ordered were ready to plant on Monday, but we were rained out, so they were delivered today. Five Hemlocks for the new visual block, south down da Lane, and the Oak Tree that Mom wanted to plant for Dad.

We'll have some photos tomorrow, thanks to Nancy and Patty!

This is Homecoming Weekend, so you know we'll be burrowed in da Woods somewhere.

Make a great weekend!

*raises a tall glass of iced water*

Howz by youz??

Schedule Changes, Again...

Monday was "Doctor Day." Vitals were taken, and we met both with both the Resident and Dr. B, following the third Booster Treatment.

Blood Pressure was running high. I asked for suggestions for treating the itching and redness around my shoulder blade. They suggest aloe-vera cream for the dry skin reaction and cortisone cream for any itching. Also asked again to have our records printed out for us.

They both assert that my being so bloated has nothing to do with the steroids I'm taking for the esophagitis. The don't find the weight gain anywhere near as disconcerting as I. I may need to medicate the esophagitis for up to a month after the treatmens end. They don't believe I'll need to ween myself from the current drug regime, i.e., I should be able to stop cold turkey. Overall I seem to be tolerating the RadioTherapy very well *knocks wood*

With all of our planning and expertise, we managed to schedule our last RadioTherapy treatment on the morning that Kevin is scheduled for his colonoscopy, i.e., Monday, Oct. 1st. We really did think we had that one covered. Good thing we weren't being paid to think when all that happened.

When I mentioned this at the appointment, Dr. B was most accommodating in suggesting that I have a day with two treatments before this Friday. Not something I could do today, but it's now in the cards for Thursday or Friday. That means I'll be done with RadioTherapy at the end of this week and won't have anything else scheduled before October 24th when we have the CT with contrast.

And, it means I can help take care of Kevin this weekend and on Monday following the procedure.

After today's appointment, one of the PA's came out with the records we had wanted to pick up last Wednesday. We'll ask for the hemotology reports tomorrow morning when we check in with Dr. C to see how the new BP meds are doing. I still need to email Dr. A about setting up an appointment for the regular part of my physical care, PAP, etc.

Carl and Patty arrived on time yesterday evening. They had time to visit with Mom before she went to bed and were able to unwind after the long trip before retiring for the night.




Spent the morning enjoying the rains on the Storm Porch upstairs. The rain started last night and continues as I write. We ended up postponing the Memorial Tree Planting until Friday morning.

Nancy arrives this afternoon, hopefully not hampered too much by the lovely rains we've enjoyed all morning.

We're looking forward to a relaxing week of family and friends.

And, it's Billiards Day!

Howz by youz??

-dp

September 23, 2007...

...from our neck of da Woods to yours, in celebration of the Autumnal Equinox:


Here's da video..

Flowers Before the Fall...

...on this the last official day of summer! Having Autumn Blooms was certainly a goal for this part of da Lane, but their being accompanied by an array of late summer bloom is unexpected and thrilling.

In addition to the fact the the Hibiscus are lading on for yet _another_ blooming -- in honor of our Guests arriving on Monday, we couldn't believe our eyes on our walk to get Mom's paper this morning.




The first to WOW us was the Bearded Iris:












Behind that were over a dozen new blossoms on the Pick Knock-Out Rose, growing in every direction.











Also blooming in what's now being called Uncle Shorty's Bed are the Stella d'Oro day lily (third or fourth blooming), purple bee balm, dianthus, Rose of Sharon, wieglia, and ajuga. Interesting complements to the Autumn Joy Sedum, Chinese Lanterns, Marigolds (volunteer), Chrysanthemums and Pansies.

Uncle Shorty's Bed is on the left as you drive in da Lane. The headboard is one of the first that we bought for him as he and Mom were moving out of their double bed: her into a hospital bed and him to a new twin. We ended up giving the first mattress away after learning he needed something softer. The headboard worked well because Dad could hook up all of his lights, bags, sacks, cases and watch holder.

Once Dad moved into the hospital bed, the Silver Headboard recycled to da EntryWay. That was in 2004. In the past three years, we've tried a number of things in that Bed. I think we finally got it.

Dad's Oak from Mom will be planted to mark the edge of our the property on that side (where the new Northside Fire Station is supposed to be built in the next decade or so...).






When we took the paper up to Mom, Kevin found a Morning Glory near the pond.








And our second Waterlily of the season!

















An amazing display!




On HEALthWatch:

The Booster Treatments (6600 Grays -- three times the previous dosage) leave me with less energy than the previous treatments. I walked a half mile this morning when I decided I may need to break today's exercise into smaller parts. Given that we have to walk up to Mom's to do laundry, I'm thinking that before the day is over, I'll have done the mile or more.

My blood pressure has been 125/85 Pulse has been running from 80-93.

dd and I have been working with massage, healing touch, focused mindfulness. On Friday she noticed reddening in the treatment area on my back, left of the shoulder blade. Ointments, creams, oils, etc. are prohibited; must be washed off at least four hours prior to the RadioTherapy Treatment. Given that we had three days to the next treatment, we worked with healing oils and managed to lessen some of the reddening.

The last treatment will be Monday, October 1st...the day of Kevin's Colonoscopy.

We both have eye appointments for the second week in October. Dental appointments also on the horizon; he didn't want to see me while I was receiving RadioTherapy treatments. Everyone I've told that to seems surprised *shrugs* Eye guy says I may be dealing with dry eye...

The CT scan with contrast is scheduled for October 24th. Those results help us plot our next course. That means we'll have a couple weeks free of daily visits to the hospital. *knocks on wood*

Here's wishing you the best, this Last Day of Summer!!
*raises a glass of iced water*

If You Could Forget...

...anything in your life, what would that be?

Leroy can be thought provoking; this is what I posted in response:

On this journey
I call my life
I've found no one
more interested
In it than I.

If I don't remember,
who will? Certainly
not the cancer...

I choose to remember
As much as I can
As long as I can
As it's who I am
And who I am to be.

-dp

Be well.

What would you choose to forget?

Gyardening...

...evidences a belief in our tomorrows.

We've found a home for the red bud (photo posted on 9/8) and a couple of our dogwoods; Nettie and dd lost trees in a storm last year and have places for a few understory trees.

Those 5+ yearold bareroot trees currently border along what we now call the Strip Bed and are casting their share of shadow on what we consider our Sunny Gyarden, including our floundering Asparagus Bed. We've tried numerous plants in that strip; so far the trees and the iris have done the best. Only a few of the prize day lilies survived, but the ones that did are gorgeous.

Last year we got the Rose Bed started there, some plantings of Shasta Daisy, which are spreading almost too rapidly, bee balm, tickseed, some geranium, vinca, dianthus, creeping phlox, transplants of cone flowers, Blackeye Susans and Painted Sunflowers started by Michael once the construction of da Lane was completed in '99 -- the few sunlovers that we've tried.

That tree border is now shading all of the above. Still left to move are a couple flowering crabs and the hawthorn. We've now found places for them, along da Lane Entry, as far up against the abutting properties as possible. Next week is forecast to be 70's during the day and 50's in the evenings -- our idea of perfect.

This weekend I was able to move everything out from under the trees to be moved, so they're ready for the taking. The Long Thin Silver Bed directly across da Lane gets the most sun, so that bed now contains more lambs ear, tickseed, bee balm, Shasta Daisies, and ground covers. The Tall Thin Bed only has a headboard, so we moved some struggling Roses of Sharon to stand as the foot of the Bed.

Also moved a dozen or so of the iris; I'm thinking there's another Bed of sorts there, but until the trees are gone, it's hard to say. Kevin is still looking at a serious, wheelchair accessible raised bed and we've even imagined a kind of Secret Garden if this hedge continues to grow...

The hardest thing for me to believe is that four of our Hisbiscus are now in their _fifth_ flowering this season. Or, is that something that's quite common and I'm just waking up to the fact?

The photo of the Painted Sun Flower is one of Kevin's from earlier this year, but there should still be some blooming for NancyTurtle's, Carl's and Patty's visits!



On our HEALthWatch:

Our Oncology Clinic was as empty as Leroy's was full today! I was able to scan around the two waiting rooms so quickly I almost gave myself whiplash. Technicians were walking around looking for something to do, clerks were actually not _swamped_. An almost uneasy peacefulness...

Mine was just a blood pressure follow-up in oncology this morning after the RadioTherapy treament; my file wasn't even in the rack of today's appointments. They wrote my name on a post-it with the letters: BP. Seconds later the BP was in and it was back to the empty waiting room to await the onc's assessment.

The hydrocholorothiazide isn't resolving the BP issue, so a beta blocker, metoprolol, will be added. CardioDept wants lower numbers, and I just don't seem to be able to learn and implement the Alternative and Complementary techniques quickly enough to resolve today's numbers. I'm still walking a mile a day, but after a month of rad tx, I know I'm slowing a bit *shrugs*

Tomorrow we begin our eight rad Booster Treatments. For starters, I have a 4" diameter, black, comic-book "POW" mark on the inside of my left breast.

Rad Tattoo, Indeed! Whoooo-whooooo!!

Howz by yourz??

Bonus Rounds!!!

As you know, Monday is Doctor Day, so upon finishing radiotherapy treatment #23, we got the official word on the Booster Treatments.

The first 25 treatments are actually considered palliative -- the goal was to stop tumor growth. Since dp is tolerating those well, the booster is bonus radiotherapy with a narrower field to see if they can do some serious damage to the tumor. 6600 CG over an eight-day period, commencing the day after treatment 25.

So now the new magic number is 33, and the new completion day is two weeks from today.

We also learned more today about the actual radiotherapy process - I think dp wrote about it earlier. The effect that radiation has on the body is caused by the fact that the energy in the radiation can cleave a hydrogen cell off of water molecules. The remaining HO hydroxide molecules are free radicals, which run around reacting with other particles, damaging the DNA of all the cells they come in contact with. According to the helpful young resident who's been sharing all this, healthy cells are able to repair this damage while cancer cells are not.

dp says this explanation makes it easier for her to visualize what's supposed to be happening. Personally, I envision tiny little Abbey Hoffman dudes smacking around cancer cells with their protest signs, but I guess free radicals aren't what they used to be...

dp's been rearranging plants, shrubs and trees. She moved a bunch around this weekend, which she says she'll blog about, while I worked on overdue bookwork and code for a new shopping cart for a website I'm designing. We manage to stay busy.


With a tip of the cranium to CraniumMan and his son, the following graphic:




...it really _is_ like throwing money at Carneys *nods*


Happy Billiards Day!!!

HEALthWatch

Monday is 'Doctor Day' in our RadiotherapyCommunity. It means we take vitals, meet with a couple nurses, sometimes a resident or three, and Dr. B, who does a cursory physical, mostly monitoring my lungs, breathing and heart and asking after degrees of pain.

Our final treatment date is still next Wednesday. Following that treatment, we're meeting with Dr. C to re-examine this high blood pressure thing. FWIW, I'm running high despite wise eating, walking, and the meds. *shrugs*

We expect to learn more about Booster Radiotherapy Treatments on Monday; so far our info in all incidental and self-researched.

I'm beginning feel the effects of the damage being done to my lungs, esophagus and throat. The Radiotherapy Shooters are prescribed an hour before meals and an hour before bed. We're finding an hourly schedule to be more effective, i.e., 6am, 11am, 5pm and 10pm, because I don't notice the effects lapsing as much as I did last week on their schedule.

Or not. I need to understand how one weighs damage to one's system in the face of healing said same system.

I am also hoping to meet with Dr. A sometime next week to discuss some secondary health issues and to help her help me better case manage this treatment among two to four different departments. I'm thinking her office can better co-ordinate the distribution of the clinic notes we're generating since all of my doctors are now with the same hospital.

CraniumMan notes that alltoomany doctors and nurses prefer clients who don't tax them, and we think he's right. Some clerks still seem surprised that we ask for copies of our records; many don't know how to help us get them.

This next week will be a test of just how well we've gotten this all coordinated *knocks wood*

Make a great rest of the week!

Stay hydrated!!

When Cancer Is Old News...

...was the title of one of Leroy's recent blogs. I find him, and his contributors, to be thought provoking -- as I'm sure you can tell from some of our topics.

I'm not sure where we are with regard to the age of our cancer news -- technically six months last week. We seem to have things in common with some of the other contributors and other things to look forward to; here are some of their insights:

--Laurel M Jones:

In the beginning of my illness back in March of 2006, I started writing an email update to family and interested friends. I had a horrible cough and it was easier than talking to people.

For a while I wrote every few days. I was at home for months dealing with a very harsh chemo regime and people wanted to know exactly what symptoms and side effects I was having. I tried to write with humor and creativity. It was both cathartic and gave me something to do with my time.

For now that need has changed. I'm much more to the point now. The longer I live with this disease and all of it's ups and downs, the less often I want to write about the day to day details.

I'm more concerned with living my life rather than documenting it.

Folks write about emails and blogs as expedient ways to disseminate information. Despite the number of related and interesting cancer blogs around, we comment about missing a more dynamic means of dialoguing within the various blog communities. My guess is that it's in the offing, somewhere *shrugs*

For us, "the sCenario" began as a way to help remember dates, times, places and people, as well as a way to convey information to those wanting it. As our situation began to settle, daily news-blasts weren't forthcoming and an alternative journal, much of it gardening, began to evolve.

Somewhere between the two is where I am now. The gardens' journals and records suffered during the past four years because of time constraints put on us doing 24/7 ElderCare. The blog has provided us with some good catching up in that regard.

In the meantime, I'm struck by Laurel's last line, above. I don't see the two as being mutually exclusive. *blinks*

-- Lynn:

I agree that the novelty has worn off not just for me but for others. The cards I used to get daily have dwindled. The prepared foods have not come in months. I don't mind. I know everyone still cares but life goes on.

Life goes on, indeed!
Let us know how yours is going; we've shown you ours, ya know!

-- Yvette:

Hi Leroy et al..
It's true that it does become old news..until you see someone or talk to someone out of the blue. An old college friend contacted me via email this week after 15 years. I debated on whether or not to tell her about the cancer but really it has unfortunately been a dominating presence in my life for the last year. How much to you say? how many details? do you say that you have been contemplating your mortality at 39? how honest are you? I told her some basics and I haven't heard back yet.. sometimes even a little bit it too much for people...

This is the newest arena for me.

I don't look 'cancer-sick.' My high-blood-pressure-red cheeks and world's longest comb-over find no one guessing we have a dx. I only huff and puff when pushing my walk or my gardening. If you hadn't been told, I'm not sure you'd guess our Stage and Type.

We can't remember who knows and who doesn't. We haven't been in the habit of disclosing to strangers, but this town and this town's hospital run some interesting parallels and perpendiculars. Our family and friends are pretty extended, sometimes overlapping, circles.

Then there are the new groups of people we meet in various waiting rooms and doctors offices where confidentiality is primarily among those of us sitting there. "Good Morning Mr. Hill! We're ready for you, now! Can you state your full name, please?"

"George Hill." George knows I have cancer; I know George has cancer. We don't know the particulars beyond that. I know that George turned 53 last Wednesday... I know lots more about him than he knows about me. Confidentiality, indeed!

Some innocent mis-speaks we all have while interacting around the cancer experiences are being collected on another blog that I read. I'll record some to share. *makes note*

--Leroy:

These days, it doesn't seem to come up so much. Certainly just about everyone I know now knows that I'm sick. There are times, in conversations with strangers, when I have to ask myself whether to tell. But most of the time, I don't say anything.

These days, the cancer feels like old news. It's just part of my life. If someone asks me how I am, unless they specifically ask about my health, I usually start talking about other things.

I'm still on the fence, here...

While not shy about talking about cancer, I am tiring of talking about cancer.

On the one hand, there's the blog; on the other hand it's not a substitute for personal interaction.

On the one hand, there are people who are avoiding me now that I'm 'sick,' on the other hand, amazing people are coming from unbelievable places to offer guidance and support.

*claps the one hand on top of the other hand*

Mostly I think there are plenty more dire and interesting things happening around us than our cancer, right now. How lucky for us all!

In the meantime, I'm loving that I can be sharing life with my soulmate.
I'm reading again. I'm gardening again. I'm writing again.

And I hope to be doing that when _that's_ old news, too.

Howz by youz??

Like Sitting Ducks...

The photographic image comes from the pond just to the left of our back porch. The ducks are ceramic and float from March until November, when they find haven with other yard kitsch away from Winter's winds; the ducks are now seven years old. To the right, you can see the reflection of our large copper ball. This is the waterfall that we rearranged last weekend so it would make more noise... The plants are water lettuce.

The metaphoric image conjures up neat rows of aberrant cells: ripe for redirection, manageable, massageable, malleable... ...easy pickings...


We, unfortunately, don't know much more today than we did prior to yesterday's meeting with Dr. C:

He is not at all concerned that I've gained 10 lbs. in the last month; I sure as hell am! *weighty sighs*

He _is_ concerned that my blood pressure is now running consistently in the 150/100 range, the concern being the diastolic (lower) number. Dr. A had expressed concerns about my blood pressure being high earlier this summer, during chemo. We've been thinking it's situational, i.e., hospital trips are stressful, radiotherapy sessions are stressful, the medication regime is stressful, hell, what _isn't_ stressful? *sighs* We've been thinking that I would be able to learn how to better self-regulate it through exercise, diet, relaxation techniques, etc.

We got a good Blood Pressure cuff and have been taking my pressure daily for some time now. So far, our good dietary and exercise intentions don't seem to be working. *heavy sighs*

We've decided that having my BP up in the 160/100 range every morning only to be able to bring it down to 140/90 at best at rest is probably not the best for my system. We've decided to use a prescription of hydrochlorothiazide until the radiotherapy is completed.

When will that be, we asked? Depends on whether we do "Booster Treatments." Since that's a radiotherapy thang, and not a chemotherapy thang, we won't have the details about that until next Monday, which is our next day with Dr. B.

The last scheduled day of the 25 treatments is Wednesday, 9/19. Were there to be Booster Treatments, they would consist of 5-10 treatments with re-calibrated rays -- narrower, with more intense focus.

My skin seems to be showing no ill effects of the radiotherapy *crosses fingers* The Radiotherapy Shooters still allow me to swallow, but I'm noticing their effects wearing off sooner and sooner each day...

In any case, we meet again with Dr. C next Wednesday to monitor the BP, and we'll get copies of the hematology records at that time. Cell counts didn't come up at the last meeting, which means they're remaining in the normal range.

It seems like as long as we continue to show no serious ill effects from the radiotherapy, the Booster Treatments are a consideration. Based on that, another CT has been scheduled for late October, which will be a month after the last treatment -- the period of time they say the radiotheraputic effect remains in place. We won't know until the results of that CT just how many cells remain.

So here we remain, like sitting ducks...

*quack*

Labels...

...rarely fit everyone in the same way.

A few daze ago, Leroy's blog dealt with the new labels that we have with regard to these aberrant cancer cells: survivor, victim, patient, got-what-she-deserved, fighter, guinea pig... His question: Can we ever be 'normal' again??

What follows is my response to his post:

========================================

Labels, just like most things, have their good points as well as their bad. We tend to agree with those who define labels similarly to the way we do. Some labels serve me better in some places, other labels serve me better at other times. Labels often provide quick and efficient ways to classify...

"Normal" for my caregiver and myself has _never_ been a static thing. As we've grown and evolved, so has our sense and define of normal. Each new job/career, each geographic move, each new relationship, each lifestyle change brought with it a new define of normalcy.

How far would I have to go back, and would I ever find that yearned for state of 'normal?' I think not. Before the cancer-change for me was the Big Change: menopause. I consider that I had a 'normal' menopausal journey, but do I want to return to being in full blown menopause again? No thank you!

During that time, I was also providing full-time care to our then 80 year old parents. Over the course of the past ten years, up until today, "normal" for us was/is in constant flux. That's why I've posted so often that we make plans so we'll have something to do in case there's no emergency.

I'm similarly adapting to the normalcy of the recent change prompted by some cancer cells. *shrugs* Am I wanting to return to another me, a previous me? Nope. I'm wanting to carry the knowledge and normalcy I acquired there forward into the new learnings and normalcy of today's tomorrows.

So, we consider us all to be normal people coping with cancer cells. If there's anything abnormal about us, it's the cells. *shrugs* I agree with Vicky in referring to this as "dis-ease" and we're learning to ameliorate it.

Some days we play the cancer card; some days we keep it in our pocket. With time, it's gotten around that we have the card to play, so I don't see where I have the right to take umbrage at that, or any label we wear, whether it be a designer label or one just off the rack.

For me, the bigger question is, "Just what the heck is 'normal,' anyway?

And surviving? We're all surviving more than just cancer! *shudders at the thought of what else is out there*

Here's wishing us well! Stay hydrated!!

===================================

...today's new label is: Booster Treatments. The technician asked today what they had decided would be my course of Booster Treatments. We were told our _last_ treatment would be next Wednesday. hrmmmm.... We have a pretty good guess...

In the meantime we meet with Dr. C tomorrow morning following our radiotherapy treatment and the blood draws. We're also planning to request a full set of our medical records as long as we have an hour or so in-between. Anything you'd like us to ask or have copies of??

We hope that no one's posting here the past few daze means that you're all off living and loving full lives of your own. *crosses fingers* Do take time to share when you find the time.

Meantime, hug your loved ones and be well!!

*raises a tall glass of iced water*

Black Magic Taro..

...another kind of magic, as promised.

This is the beginning of the focus on the Black Magic Taro, from overhead. It's always been one of the challenging things about planting our WisconsinYard: gardening with an aerial perspective since the Guests' Deck looks down on that yard.

So here's the aerial view, and beginning, of my BlackMagicTaroRelaxation visualization:





This plant started here last summer -- 8" tall. By last fall it was a three foot plant. We kept it watered and happy in Mom's living room over the winter, though it was cut back a foot or so. This spring we put it back in our pond and what you are seeing is this year's fall growth glowing behind the row of gold standard and lancifola hosta:




Actually, for the next couple weeks, if you want to know what I'm looking at in the WisconsinYard, this would be it! I'm also considering entering this photo in a couple contests. And it's set to be wallpaper for our laptop once the winter winds begin to fly:



We're thinking we may need to divide it this year; would be wonderful to have two of them to deal with next fall!

Mom came to visit this morning, so we sat and watched birds in front of our house for a change. Since it was such a nice morning, and since the mosquitoes were beginning to find our lovely hide-away, we decided to move up da Lane for a look at the flowers and some light gardening.

Managed to get the Asparagus Bed cleared of the Obedient Plant while we visited. Kevin moved a 150+ lb rock so I could plant part of the bed of the Obedient Plant in front of Mom's screened in porch. The rock was moved to the fire circle and is currently a wonderful bench by the fire pit.

Did some errands this afternoon and are back to enjoy that pondside Black Magic Taro view again, which I thought I'd share before we head out. Hope you enjoy it. And, you still have a couple weeks to see it in person, as long as the temps don't drop too quickly...

Howz by youz??

Make nice and stay hydrated!!

Radiotherapy Shooters...

...that's what I call them.

All of the doctors here refer to the concoction as 'Magic Mouth Wash' -- always following the utterance of the name with a smirky snicker.

The only way I can get it down is to throw it back like I would a Shooter, on the exhale, so it's less likely to trigger a gag response. *sighs*

What's in the glass is the tablet that has been pulverized (crushing it makes gagging lumps) and then dissolved in 2 TBSP water. The tablet is to coat the ulcers that the radiotherapy is causing in my esophagus.

To that is added 1 TBSP Nystatin, which has the smell that is sickly reminiscent of minty mouth wash; it contains the anti-fungal agent needed because of the damage done to the esophagial cells by the radiotherapy.

Then to all of that, the Hydrocortisone Suspension, which has a faint citrus odor, is added to help with the inflammation of my esophagus caused by the radiotherapy.

All of that, four times each day. One hour before meals. One hour before bed. Kevin has been helping mix them; I seem to be able to get it down better if I haven't been smelling that sweet, sickly smell for the time it takes to create the concoction.

It hasn't cleared the irritation completely, but mostly I can swallow without it hurting. I mostly need to be careful with hard crusted breads, etc., but if I chew carefully, I can still eat adult food.

Hydromorphone was prescribed for pain. I've only taken one. This pill, along with the ingredients in the Shooter, rank constipation as one of the many side effects, so I'm back on stool softeners, as well.

Friday's treatment was number seventeen; there are eight treatments left. We meet with Dr. C on Wednesday and will have labs done before we meet with him.

Kevin and I walked a mile this morning after Trooley took the paper from the road to Mom. It was another of those perfect IC days, and we were drawn to the back porch where the waterfalls are now providing a nice counter to the passing traffic. Even the mosquitoes kept a respectful distance this morning.

We spent the rest of the day between chores, web design, yardening and just hanging out enjoying the day. Kevin did computer work out on the deck. Something very _wrong_ about taking a computer out into the Big Room...unless, of course, you're NancyTurtle and it's the only place you can get a signal. *heh*

Also took some photos of our Black Magic Taro, which we'll post tomorrow. Much better 'magic' than the concoction, in many ways!

Today's photo is of our Obedient Plant, apropos of how I feel about those Shooters. The red flowers in front of the purple Obedient Plant are one of our hibiscus -- in it's _third_ flowering this season! Overhead arches a branch of a bareroot rosebud that we need to move. The bed to the left is the Asparagus Bed, which is being overgrown by the Obedient Plant...which makes it currently a dis-Obedient Plant *smirks*



So, here are Obedient Cheers, for you! *raises a tall glass of ice water*

Make nice and stay hydrated!!!

Promised Jokes...

Are there some topics that can't be joked about or otherwise mocked? I remember George Carlin taking on the issue of rape, solely to make the point that he believes we need to be able to laugh at everything.

Leroy broached the same subject a few daze ago in his blog and a number of folks chimed in. Many had tales of funny experiences related to the cancerCommunity that were better than some of the jokes.

The one that got it started:


Why do they nail shut the coffin of cancer patients?
So the doctors won't do just one more chemotherapy/radiotherapy treatment.



The doctor stands with a woman at the foot of an empty bed.
"Well," he said, "I think we finally got all of the cancer!"



The doctor said to the patient, "I'm afraid I have some bad news for you, you have cancer."

"Is there any good news?" the patient asked.

"No, I'm afraid there's just more bad news." the doctor replied. "You have Altzheimer's Disease."

"Whew," the patient exhales, "Thank goodness I don't have cancer!"



One woman shared an ongoing dialogue with the nurses and other patients regarding her chemotherapy which was referred to as "FU!" ...what are you here for? F U!



T-Shirts/Hats out there:

Cancer Sucks!

F*ck Cancer (both with and without the asterisk)

I have chemoBrain, what's your excuse??

One more MRI and I'll stick to the refrigerator.

This cancer picked the wrong diva.

And this one done by Kate, a 35 year old with pancreatic cancer, which is my favorite:

Foxtrot
Uniform
Charlie
Kilo

Cancer!



Any of them tickle your fancy? If not, let me share my most recent favorite:


A chicken and an egg are lying in bed.

The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette, with a satisfied smile on its face.

The egg, looking a bit ticked off, grabs the sheet, rolls over, and says,
"Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question!"




If you've heard others, please feel free to share.

There are a number of folks who have composed lists of the benefits of coping with cancer; let us know if you're interested in a collection of those?

Gardened in the rain today. Moved over a dozen hostas; some moved to da Red House and some relocated in our Wisconsin yarden.

Best part of the day was sitting in the blazing sun while it rained on us. Thought at first it was just treefall, but it wasn't. We were sunning in the rain. Trippee!

How've your daze been??

Make nice, and stay hydrated!!!

Ramblings...

I don't think we're quite ready to post the details of just how the radiotherapy restructures water molecules to make them destroy living cells, so I thought I'd share some of the thoughts that I've posted on Leroy's blog recently:


8/21/07

Yesterday's post (Cancer is Pain) also prompted me to want to respond to "afraid" who posted a few days ago in response to our recent discussion of pain:

"afraid"> Hopefully you've stayed with Leroy's
blog a few days more. I must admit that while
I contributed to the discussion about the pain(s)
of dealing with cancer, it rekindled many fears
_we_ had immediately following our diagnosis.

We encourage you to visit other 'editions' of
this facet (this blog) of the CancerCommunity
through the chronologic archive listing. Here
you will find one of the most constructive online
communities we've yet to encounter.

Were I to list the commenters here who have helped us in the past six months without their knowing, _this_ comment would be rejected because of length. *grins*

Most of what I've learned about being a member of the CancerCommunity, I've learned from all of you. And, I thank you for that. You make even the 'uncomfortable learning' more comfortable, as there's some comfort just in knowing one isn't alone.

I salute you all!



8/23/07

We were raised hearing the following:

"I cried because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet." -Unknown.

It's that notion, along with looks around the world-at-large throughout my life that remind me daily of how many blessings we have to count -- this blog now among them.

Happy 26th Anniversary, Kevin, my most amazing caregiver! I can't deny having wondered if I'd be here to celebrate this one. How terrific that I was able to add a half mile to my walk this morning as a beginning to our day of celebration!

May we all recognize and count blessings galore!

*remembers to count working appliances among her blessings*



8/27/07

Leroy> "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" is one of our favorite movies, but I've always considered the _cancer_ to be the outlaw and my body, in concert with our oncology team, to be the sheriff and posse...

I think that's what I like best about your blog and its commenters: the wide array of attitudes and approaches we all share.

I've commented earlier that I consider curing this cancer to be one of the most serious and laborious jobs I've ever had. It's becoming increasingly clear that for many it's been more of a career than a job; clearly, there's so much more to learn...



8/28/07 (Leroy's first cancerjoke)

Some years ago I stopped watching the late evening news in favor of watching or reading something funny. There are plenty of other times and sources to access the ugliness in the World. Humor was a much more soothing way for me to fall asleep.

In line with today's topic, the first time George Carlin did a rape joke to demonstrate that there's nothing wherein we can't find something to laugh about, I spent a long time thinking...

I spent that same long time again the first time I heard a stand-up comedian discuss cancer as a part of his routine. Since then, I was pointed to Funky Winkerbean who did a series on breast cancer.

Gallows humor... better than no humor at all, say we!



8/29/07

We heard your broadcast this morning on our way to treatment. While we thoroughly enjoy reading your articles, it was a treat to hear your voice -- a welcome, soothing treat.

With regard to making plans:
Because of our careers, we've often joked that we seem to make plans so that we'll have something to do in case no emergency comes up. *grins* It's served us well over the years and has certainly made dealing with this cancer a little easier.

Lastly, I, and many of our generation never expected to see the turn of the century, or, more precisely, we expected we'd destroy the planet before then. So, when I think about it, I've already been alive seven years longer than I'd thought I'd be. *shrugs*



9/4/07

Our hopes for better television shows have prompted us to ask our friends and family for their best book and music recommendations *shrugs*

My eyes tire a bit more easily of late, but I'll keep reading until I can't. And then, perhaps my care-giving spouse can start paying back some of the time I've put in reading to him while we were on some of those scenically less interesting roadtrips. *smiles*

The only 'urgency' I note of late is making sure my financial and paper ends are tied up so that it won't fall onto family and friends. Once that's cleared up, I'm sure I'll be able to just lay back, relax, enjoy and cruise through the therapies and life... *heh*

---------------------------

Some different thoughts than we've shared here... Will post some of the jokes later this week *grins bigly*

Howz by you??

Happy Anniversary Doc and Olive, Ann and Jeff!!

Stay hydrated!!!

Tuesday...

...which is really Monday for most folks today, including those at the hospital pharmacy *sighs*

I said I'd be here, and here I am, feeling very much like it's Monday and in somewhat less pain than I've been in since Friday.


Yesterday, which really _was_ Monday, we were Mom's adult daycare, since her paid gig was closed for the holiday...Happy Labor-less Day for some...

Since Kevin's found a cheap, reliable fix for the front wheels of Mom's chair, and since there were two of us, we decided to walk Mom the mile to the cemetery so she could see Uncle Shorty's marker and stone properly set in the ground. Trooley's first venture in that direction and we all did very well.

The stone was _so_ properly set, both his and her (put there in '97) stones were 3/4 covered by newly mown lawn and needed edging. I managed to pull all of the overlying clumps before Kevin got Mom to the grave.

We need to come up with some kind of light-weight rampy-thing to make rolling a wheelchair over the uneven cemetery grounds a bit easier. Larger wheels would make things easier, but we need to look at accommodating what we have at this point. TIA for any ideas you might have...we know there are a number of innovative, not to mention engineering, minds perusing these musings.

Mom really enjoyed the walk and we'd like to be able to make the trip a few more times before winter sets sidewalks impassable. *crosses fingers*

Mom wanted stuffed fish for her birthday lunch -- stuffed fish and Dirty John's Death-By-Chocolate Cake. So that's what we had. 'Cept by the time she finished the main course, she didn't have room for the cake! *heh*

Monday was a beautiful day to sit on the porch, and porch-sitting is one of Mom's favorite things to do -- especially when she can sit and see the pond. We spent the afternoon sittin' and knittin'.



So this post is long enough already:

The good news is that it isn't a 24/7 pain; the bad news is that it's painful anytime I swallow, or burp, or think about swallowing...

Got to the clinic 20 minutes early, and they took me as soon as I'd changed. The three patients waiting when I went into the radiotherapy room were there when I came out a few minutes later. The rest of the clinic was obviously dealing with everyone else's three day weekend, so we waited over an hour to see the Resident du jour who was followed shortly by Dr. B.

We all seemed relieved that we wouldn't require much of Dr. B's time this morning. We have an expected condition known as esophogitis, an inflamation of the esophogus. We were prescribed a cocktail to be taken four times a day made of: Nystatin Suspension, an antifungal used in mouth infections, a Hydrocortisone Suspension (for which we received no 'patient notes'... we know it's a steroid used for anti-itch/pain relief?), and a sucralfate tablet dissolved in 2 Tbsp H20. The latter is prescribed for ulcers. Oh, yeah, all that needs to be consumed one hour before each of three meals and one hour before sleep.

Side effect of all of that? The same as the cancer, the chemo, the radiotherapy, and then some. No one has given us a way to tell which symptom means what these daze... Oh, forgive me, the Resident did say that if drinking hot liquids was making my esophagus feel hot, I shouldn't drink hot liquids... AAARRGGHHH! I also asked if there weren't exercises I could be doing (read something at John Hopkins) and he said, "Oh, no." We found out he'll be here for three years, and we believe he's trainable *nods* We hope to hear from Nurse Nancy if the 'no exercise helps' thing isn't true. *waves*

This Resident's info about the U Hosp pharmacy was soooooooo wrong! Kevin's experience with the U Hospital's pharmacy was _horrendous_. Would be nice to know who at U Hospital should hear _that_ nightmare. The short of it is we had to have our local pharmacist fill part of it three hours later... Hoooooray for our local pharmacists!!

And now this post is even longer. Then again, we did take a couple daze off.

Here's hoping your Labor Day was also filled with labors of love;
and today filled with more.

Happy Billiards and Massage Day!

Stay hydrated! *raises a 16 oz. glass of water*

September 3, 1915

Auntie 'Rie! Hope it's the happiest!!
We know she'd love to hear from you: 319.358.7309







To the rest of us!


-Diana and Kevin

Reflections

...catch me offguard.






It's becoming increasingly difficult to swallow things, both literally and figuratively.

I'm taking some time away; see you on Tuesday.

Wishing you a great Labor Day!